Saturday, May 3, 2008

Feet firmly on the ground, thank you.

Early Monday morning, I'm leaving my house while it's still dark in order to catch a flight to Washington D.C.

I'm not looking forward to it--the flight, that is. The trip will be wonderful. Mike has to go to a conference out there and we decided it would be a great opportunity to take our oldest on a trip to D.C. He's wanted to go for a long time, but the thought of carting four children, three of which are under the age of 6, around D.C. didn't seem like a very good idea. How do you get the point across to people the historical value of seeing the Declaration of Independence when all they want to do is go swim in the hotel pool?

So, the trip was planned and we're all excited except I'm having horrible anxiety about the flight out there. I've disliked flying for my entire life because it makes me nauseous. I don't throw up or anything, but I just feel blah. As I've grown older, I've been afraid of planes crashing. I realize all the stats about cars being more dangerous than planes, etc. etc., but it's a fear of mine. The potential nausea coupled with the fear of crashing added to the fact that I haven't flown since 9/11 and now I'll be paranoid about terroists makes me want to drive to D.C., or take a bus, a train, or hitchhike, or ride a skateboard. ANYTHING BUT FLY!!!!

The root of this fear is leaving the three little ones orphaned. My parents are watching them for us and I would hate to leave my parents with three children should our plane crash. Yes, I know, paranoia will do nothing for me.

That aside, I'll miss them terribly and hearing their little voices on the phone each day will make my heart break and then I'll lament that we should've brought them with us and all the pushing in strollers, taking 20 potty breaks, and listening to the whining would all be worth it because we'd all be there together.

On the other hand, it will be awesome to be with J by ourselves and give him some undivided attention and just let him be a kid instead of the "big brother/3rd parent" role he's often forced to play.

So if you think about it Monday morning and then Thursday afternoon, pray for me and my plane and my pilot, and the mechanics who worked on the plane, and that there won't be any psycho people on my plane, and that there won't be any turbulance, and that I won't be one big raw nerve by the time I get done with this trip.


1 comment:

Colleen said...

I. don't. fly. either.
I HAVE to get over that as I used to fly.
Can you get an Rx from the doc for something a little 'calming'? And by calming, I mean unconcious.
Let me know how it all goes when you get back.